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  • Ashlee

Show Up

No matter how you feel, get up, dress up, and show up. (AND NEVER GIVE UP!) I’ve heard this phrase before, but it never meant as much to me then as it does now.  It’s funny how you can read something over and over, but it doesn’t really click until you need it. No matter how you feel.   I feel crappy a lot of the time.  As I recently mentioned to a friend, I have a trailer full of emotional baggage that I carry with me daily.  It makes me so tired. Exhausted.  That, coupled with my autoimmune disease (in which my body literally doesn’t make enough energy), and relapses of Epstein-Barr virus, sometimes all I want to do is lie in bed. Get up. Dress up. Show up.  For a little while I think I’ve been using my health problems and family difficulties as an excuse to not be the best me… I’ve been allowing my circumstances to control how I feel instead of taking charge of it myself. I think that in some way, it’s okay to feel grief for the way that life events have played out.  It’s okay to be upset and even bereft for a little while.  But only for a little while.  Because it’s soo easy to let yourself be mediocre.  It’s a lot harder to pull yourself out of the dark places and make yourself progress.  But I promise that you will feel better if you try to feel better. So on those days when you can’t imagine having to do your hair (something that seems so trivial in the grand scheme of things), get up a little earlier to do it.  On those days when you just want to wear sweats because you feel fat and ugly, wear a nice outfit.  And on those days when you just want to check out and blow everyone off, put yourself out there.  You just might surprise yourself with the amount of strength that you have. Trust me, I’m finding that out myself.

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